A remarkable turn of events!

Two important updates to my coffee conundrum, and a whole new question.

UPDATE #1 - Voter Fraud Strikes This Blog!!

ACORN, it appears, is still alive and well: registering everyone from Mickey Mouse to the Globe Trotters. And now they've struck my blog's recent coffee poll! Thankfully, no expense is spared here and we've had a crack team of international monitors checking things out every step of the way (pictured right), so there's no way the fraudulent votes would slip past us!

On Monday with 24 hours to go, the polling was a landslide for me: 17 people had voted "Heck yeah!" 3 had voted the more subdued but still Matt-affirming "yes," and only 2 people had voted "no." And one of those two was Esther herself! (the other guilty party, though known, shall remain unnamed) So, at 20 for and only 2 against, the people were clearly speaking for truth and justice. That was at 4:30 p.m.

Then, at 6:00 p.m., a mere 1.5 hours later, the "no" vote tally mysteriously leaped from 2 to 19! A quick check of the site visit statistics showed that only three separate visitors had hit my blog during the time the phantom "votes" appeared. Then, the next morning 3 more site visits mysteriously resulted in 20 more fraudulent votes. Yeah, right... what do you people take me for!?! Looks like someone figured out how to delete their Internet cookies and artificially stuff my ballot box. But WE ARE NOT FOOLED! This is America, and the authentic votes of the people are what count. The people have spoken and Esther was clearly urged by one and all to share a glorious pot of Jamaica Blue Mountain coffee with me. Oh, and the FBI's Voter Fraud Unit is on its way over to Nike headquarters in Beaverton as we speak...

But wait, it gets even better!


UPDATE #2 - The Tables Turn!!

Proving that cheaters never win, and that God is on my side in this, two amazing occurrences have completely shifted the balance of power in this contest. First, a sensible, gracious, and intelligent reader had so much compassion on me that he bought me a half pound of Jamaica Blue Mountain! That's right - I have my first ever bag of this bliss right in my own cupboard! Pat Magee, you're my new hero, and your character is clearly constituted of different stuff than... some people's.

Second, Esther called her mother to make sure a pound of JBM was coming this holiday season for her... and it isn't! Turns out mommy didn't travel to Jamaica this year and thus didn't bring any home, so no JBM for Esther this Christmas! When she told me the news she was sad, but when she realized I had my own JBM she was positively shocked. Justice is so sweet! She couldn't believe that the tables had been turned so completely on her that she followed me and my bag of coffee around the church all morning, begging for a few beans so she could make a pot for herself.

I'm not making this up - this couldn't get any better. Now I am the one with the power! I am the one with the status! I am the one with the beans! Which leads me to my new dilemma...


A NEW QUESTION - Should I give Esther any Jamaica Blue Mountain Coffee?

You've now heard the story. You've witnessed the harsh treatment I received at the hands of Esther. Now that the tables are turned you've seen her follow me around and beg me to share with her even though she wouldn't share with me! So how should I respond?

• Option 1 - No way Jose! Someone needs to learn a lesson in humility and sharing! Especially someone who's job is molding the hearts and minds of the next generation.
  
• Option 2 - "Pray about it..."


• Option 3 - Take the high road and extend grace even though it's not deserved.

Now, I would set up a new poll but I'm afraid ACORN may show up again at any time. So this time, please let me know which option you think I should choose by leaving a comment!

Setting Esther straight...

I need the help of my astute readership to resolve a new problem.

Recently Peet's Coffee announced a new limited crop of the world's most rare and exquisite coffee: Jamaica Blue Mountain. Grown in Jamaica's Blue Mountains (that figures - pictured below) this coffee is well known amongst coffee connoisseurs as being the world's finest, but I've never had the opportunity to actually try it due to the price tag: Peet's is selling it for a limited time only at the astronomical price of $40 per half pound. Ouch! No way can I afford that.

Enter Esther Boley, a fellow coffee snob who happens to have been born in Jamaica and thus is extremely partial to Jamaica Blue Mountain coffee. Because of the family connection to that Caribbean island, Esther's mother sends her a pound of JBM coffee every year for Christmas. Nice gift! So I suggested that out of a whole pound, she would surely be willing to part with a few ounces to a good friend like me so I could brew my first-ever pot of this exquisite treat.

She laughed in my face. Just look at her: she's mocking me. If that's not a "I get Jamaica Blue Mountain and you don't" look, I don't know what is!

Now, regular readers of this blog will recall that when I won free Peet's coffee for a year I got to designate 5 friends who also received free Peet's for the year. Esther was one of those friends. Yes, that's right: my dear friend Esther has been enjoying an entire year's worth of top quality Peet's Coffee shipped right to her door fresh every month, completely free of charge. All because of me! Total retail value of her coffee year is over $400 - yet she laughed at the suggestion of parting with $8 worth of Jamaica Blue Mountain in return. I, I... I'm stunned. I don't know what to do with myself. My equilibrium has been thrown off. I'm not sleeping well anymore. I don't have friends any longer...

Her reason for this moral outrage? She hasn't given me one. When I pointed out all the above to her, she simply said she'd "pray about it." Huh? Pray about it? What's there to pray about!?! That's like praying about whether you should go to work in the morning, or whether to pay your water bill. You don't pray about such things, you just do what's right! Right?

Here's where you come in. Having had my core sense personhood so thoroughly shaken, I've decided to submit this matter to the court of my blog readership. Please register your thoughts in my poll to the right.

Vote for truth. Vote for justice. Vote for a few ounces of Jamaica Blue Mountain - my dream come true!

On a Lighter Note (Two Notes, Actually...)

Things are looking up!

First, Elizabeth and I headed for the mountains last Friday for some good daddy-daughter time. There are distinct advantages to owning a real 4x4 and living in Western Oregon at the same time, and the Tillamook State Forest is one of them! We drove the 40 or so miles to the Western end of the TSF and hit the offroad portion of our adventure: six miles of steep logging roads winding waaaaaay back up into the mountains to a remote trailhead. By the time you're 2 miles off the highway you've already climbed over 1,500 feet, and the views from these remote areas are stunning. Though my Scout is basically a stock vehicle with no hard-core off-roading modifications, it blasts up the steep, loose terrain like it's flat ground. International Harvester: 4x4 the way God intended! By the way, notice Elizabeth's hat which says "My Daddy Drives A Scout." But all this Scout love is distracting me from the story...

After the 6-mile offroad adventure we parked the Scout at the foot of the Cedar Butte trail (pic right is looking down on our ride from the beginning of the trail). Due to its remote location and inaccessibility to grocery-getter wheels, this trail isn't heavily used. It was a pretty narrow track in most places, was mildly overgrown (we never had trouble seeing the trail, but brush and wild flowers were thick) and it had several downed trees across it in numerous spots that we had to clamber over, under, or around. The trail itself is only 3/4 mile long but the Ranger District listed it as "difficult." Well, I'm here to tell you, it is in fact "difficult." Most of the relatively short distance is a very steep climb up the backside of the butte. We scrambled and slipped our way, getting much worse traction with our feet than the Scout got on its wheels. But when we finally made it, the view was breathtaking!

The Pacific Ocean is underneath all those clouds behind Elizabeth - unfortunately they were pretty thick down on the coastline so we never saw the water, which you can when it's clear. But where we were it was a perfect sunny and about 80 degrees with a light breeze.

We managed to get back to the Scout without breaking any bones (going down was even more...adventurous, than going up) and then enjoyed the 6-mile trail ride back down to the highway. We finished off the afternoon with a stop at Peet's on the way home where two hot travellers imbibed a couple fruit tea coolers. It was a great day!

Which leads me to the other cool thought for this post: just when you thought there couldn't possibly be any way Peet's Coffee could get better... they just installed free wireless internet at my local store! Are you kidding me!?!? I used to say half-jokingly that Peet's is my other office. Now I'm saying more seriously that my actual office is my other office - I'm moving in to Peet's permanently! I'm already on a first-name basis with half the baristas, and now I can get e-mail there too!

Yesterday one of the high school girls at the church heard me saying "I'm working at Peet's now," and she said "really, you work at Peet's? That's cool!" So I had to clarify for her: "Well, I work for Harvest, but I work at Peet's!"


*sighs contentedly* This has been a good week.

Peet's Coffee + Esther Boley = A "Shot" In The Arm!

Peet's Coffee did it again - they made my day today. I had rationed my first month's winnings almost perfectly, running out just one day before the new shipment arrived. So I left the house this morning dejected and coffee-less. Thankfully my bride reminded me that I had a coupon for a free small coffee from Peet's, so off I went in pursuit of the elixir.

When I arrived I ordered a large coffee, paying the 30-cent difference between a small and a large, and was told I'd have to wait a couple minutes while a fresh batch brewed. I can always spare a minute for the freshest coffee possible, but a quick burst of customers left me waiting about 5 minutes. No big deal on my end, but to the conscientious employees of Peet's (which loves me, remember) it was a big deal. So I was handed another coupon for a free drink of any type or size on my next visit.

Somewhat taken aback, I staggered out to my man-rig and plopped my not-yet-coffeed carcass in the drivers seat. Then it hit me: I had spent a mere 30 cents, and for that I got 20 ounces of pure liquid joy AND a promise of more to come. Peet's always hooks me up!

Needless to say by the time I called Amy and told her the story I was in an outstanding mood. I then had to tell my co-worker Esther. You see, Esther became a dedicated Peet's convert shortly after I introduced her to the world's finest coffee, and she was one of the five recipients of free coffee when I won the contest. She too had run out and was eagerly awaiting her next shipment. So, feeling rather magnanimous, I gave her the free drink card I had just received and told her to go get a latte on me! Well, on Peet's. That made HER day.

Now some of my dear readers know Esther, but for the many who don't some explaining is in order. So let me describe Esther: Hmmm... thinking, thinking... well, she's... she's kind of like... oh never mind, I can't get it all into one post. Suffice it to say she refuses (deliberate choice on her part) to learn the meaning of words like "circumspect," "wall flower," or "bashful," and she's never met a stranger -- at least from her vantage point! So she not only waltzed into Peet's got her free latte, but she announced that she was a "collateral winner" of the contest at which time the entire store erupted in applause for her. Then somehow in the midst of all the bruhaha (I'm still not quite clear on how this happened) she managed to procure a good sized sample of a Peet's iced tea cooler! Only Esther could pull all this off with natural talent alone and no pre-planning.

I was so impressed with her story upon her victorious return to the office that I called Amy who agreed to meet Esther and I back at Peet's for a photo op with the fabulous people who had injected new life into several dreary Thursdays. What a way to start a day: Peet's coffee + Esther's... Esther-ness. Awesome!

L-R: Joel the applause instigator, my co-worker Esther, Megan the barista, and me with May's supply of coffee in a box!

This Is Really Getting Funny!

I had intended my last Peet's coffee post to be the final one, but I can't let this go without blogging about it! From the moment I made my Destiny or Coincidence post things have continued to take on a life of their own, moving from an innocent blog poll, to entering an official contest, to becoming a winner of said contest and receiving Peet's beans for a year, and now this craziness...

Our next door neighbor Robyn just told Amy, "It's not everyday I get to read about a neighbor in the newspaper." Of course Amy was completely caught off guard and didn't know what Robyn was talking about, until she explained that the Beaverton Valley Times ran a brief blurb on my contest victory. Really!

Amy and I almost couldn't believe it (they certainly didn't arrange an interview with the victor, much less even inform us) until Robyn handed us her copy of the local rag. Sure enough, under the title "Coffee Lover's Essay Earns Free Beans From Peet's" is a brief summary of "Beaverton resident Matt Guerino" and his recent triumph, along with some blah blah from a Peet's PR guy about how great the contest is going. While they didn't interview me, the VT did quote briefly from my winning essay.

This is a momumental achievement. After all, it's not just anyone who gets written about in a publication as prestigious as THE Beaverton Valley Times. Just to give you a sense of how big a deal this is, my blurb appeared on the same page that reported major headline news stories such a new web site launched by the Small Business Administration, an upcoming student art display at a local car dealership, and (most impressive of all) the grand opening of the Camp Doggie Tails full service dog salon. This is NEWS people!

So let me see: I settle the question of destiny, win free coffee for a year, and now I'm a local celebrity! What will happen next? A seat next to the Mayor at Portland's Rose Festival? Official pronouncement at this summer's Olympic Games in Beijing? An invitation to ride shotgun on the next space shuttle launch? Stay tuned...

Here I am with the newspaper and my 1st free coffee beans from Peet's!

Peet's Coffee - Epilogue

I'm happy (thrilled would be more like it) to report that I am one of last week's winners in the "Why I Love Peet's" contest that Peet's Coffee is running! That means that they posted my entry on their winner's page, and more importantly I have won free Peet's coffee for a full year, as have 5 of my friends. How cool is THAT!?!

Destiny... I certainly hope the two people who voted "coincidence" in my recent poll are duly repentant!

The People Have Spoken

The voting results are in, and I'm happy to report that no superdelegates will cast doubt on the outcome of this poll. The official results:

Is my relationship with Peet's Coffee destiny? Or merely coincidence?

30 votes cast.

Destiny - 16 votes
Coincidence - 2 votes
Matt is wierd - 12 votes

So the people have spoken, and my relationship with Peet's is clearly a matter of destiny!

Now, I take 2 things away from these results. First, in the future I will be careful not to put 2 correct answers in a 3-way poll. It occurs to me that many voters were torn between "destiny" and "wierd," (why this would be the case I have no idea, but so it seems to have been) and several just couldn't resist that last option. Now, initially it occured to me to say that was an incorrect response. But since my friend Melissa was the first one to register that choice I thought better of denying it's validity. I learned long ago that you'll be wrong if you go against Ms. Wright.

Second, I take these results as a resounding affirmation of my original premise, since 28 out of 30 voters recognized that "coincidence" was simply not an adequate explanation of the facts. I think the collective wisdom of my valued readers is displayed and vindicated in such an overwhelming showing. As for the 2 random "coincidence" voters, they've served a useful purpose by reminding us that there's always someone who'll refuse to accept even clear-cut conclusions. :)

Thanks to all of you who voted in this important poll. If you'd like to discuss the results further, I'm open to doing so... over a mug of Major Dickason's blend at Peet's! In the meantime, I'll drink a cup o' destiny...


We now return you to our regularly scheduled (and generally much less silly) blogging.

Only 2 Days Left!!

Only 2 days remaining in my Destiny or Coincidence poll! See sidebar to vote. It's a very close race so far. You can make a difference in the outcome! The poll closes Saturday at 9:30 pm!

I feel compelled to point out that I first wrote the post on why I love Peet's Coffee, which spurred the poll, just for the fun of it. Then, literally 2 days after posting it I discovered that Peet's is having a "Why do you love Peet's Coffee" giveaway contest! Is that cool or what?!

Now, I honestly did NOT know about this contest when I first posted. Honest! I posted Saturday, but our incredible Office Manager Barb Fromm told me about the contest Monday morning -- she can vouch for me. So, how can anyone now say that it's not Destiny!?! Peet's and I were thinking the same thing at the same time, unbeknownst to one another. We're obviously on the same wavelength - it was just meant to be. I sincerely hope that this puts to rest any final, lingering doubts in anyone's mind.

And if I WIN the contest (yes, of course I've entered!) there should be absolutely no doubt left.

THANKS FOR YOUR VOTE!!

Destiny or Coincidence? My relationship with Peet’s Coffee

Some things, it seems, are just meant to be. You know what I mean: everything seems to align in an uncanny perfect way, things seem more natural than breathing, and there are too many coincidences to be, well, just coincidences. So it is between myself and Peet’s Coffee.

My love for Peet’s began back in my college years. I was fortunate to spend my undergraduate years in the thriving bastion of wild nuttiness known as Berkeley, CA - the same place where, 25 years earlier, a Dutchman named Alfred Peet decided to open the nation’s first real coffee shop.


Peet moved to the US after WWII and was reportedly appalled at the quality of coffee Americans were drinking (he must have run into church coffee). So he opened his first store on Vine Street in Berkeley with a simple, yet profound and moving mission: to raise the expectations of American coffee drinkers. Poetry, pure poetry!

It is a little-known fact that Alf, as I affectionately call him (funny, he seems like a cherished old uncle even though I never met the man), trained three young men in the art of real coffee roasting. Those three later left the business and started a little coffee joint in Seattle they named… Starbucks. No, I’m not kidding. In fact, Peet’s Coffee supplied Starbucks with its beans when Starbucks was just getting off the ground. From there Starbucks sold their collective soul to the demon of commercial enterprise, of course, but that’s a different subject. One of those founders became so disenfranchised with Starbucks that he left the business and became the CEO of Peet’s when Alf retired (he's since moved on to that great coffee field in the sky).

Anyway, Peet’s Coffee never left it’s original mission, or its dedication to simply brewing real, good, coffee. Simple. Real. Can you see why I like it so much? Basically the same reasons I love my Scout, but I digress...

Now here’s where it gets really interesting: it would appear that Peet’s loves me too. In fact, they’re following me wherever I go. Shortly after I moved to Portland I began to despair of ever finding a good source for coffee locally, so I did the only truly sensible thing I could do: I mail-ordered from Peet’s. Then, after several years of fantastic-smelling mail, Peet’s opened their first Portland store on NE Broadway, just 10 minutes from our house. When I asked them why they chose Portland, they said mail order volume was a big factor. I knew then that I had done my part.

The final proof materilized when Amy and I moved across town to Beaverton in 2006, without a Peet’s close by. Until 3 months ago, that is, when Peet’s opened a brand new store (a.k.a. “Matt’s other office”) less than a mile from the church where I work. Could life get any better?

So I ask you dear readers, is this mutual, win-win relationship not a textbook example of pure destiny? Please register your vote on my poll to the right and let me know what you think.